青方 发表于 2011-8-19 19:42:11

大女儿的诗和短文(英文)

本帖最后由 青方 于 2011-8-19 06:47 编辑

女儿写的东西基本不让我看,这是发表在学校小报上的,7年级的作品。
诗(写在国家标点符号日):
The Dot
...
The dot was black yet very blue
He never had a job to do
He would just lie in bed all day
With his room in ugly disarray
Sometimes he sadly admitted
That he was really quite dim-witted
He played with his comma friends
But they were all just odds and ends
So he said, “I’m leaving! This place isn’t for me,”
And he let those weirdo commas be,
And ventured off into the question place
But they were smart, to his disgrace
He ended up with the exclamations
But despised their annoying accusations
So took a map and started to sail
Far away, to the land of Braille
And found some dots that were just like him
Round and fat and equally dim
He realized that they numbered in myriads
And decided to call them periods
. . .
作文:
Concerning the LGSS

In all my years of schooling, I have learned two main ways to write – the five-paragraph essay and the Look Good Sound Smart (LGSS) formula for answering open-ended questions. In elementary school, they called the LGSS by a different name: the Better Answers formula. It doesn’t matter what the teachers call it, I am thoroughly sick of LGSS.
Unfortunately, teachers still love the LGSS; they lay it down as if they were cradling darling little babies, gently. They throw bundles of LGSS prompts at their students with their faces shining like Christmas lights.
The LGSS is a dictator that tells you what you should write. It can be divided into several steps: the restate, gist, list, reaction, and conclusion. (The reaction is optional, unless it is stated clearly in the prompt.) After you memorize these steps, you swallow them and regurgitate them onto a piece of paper, which you then turn in to a teacher. I’ve probably written over a hundred of LGSS pieces in this way.
But, enough! Ranting for pages and pages – until the subject is reduced to dust – does not do the LGSS justice. Dull as it may seem, the LGSS is indeed a structure, and a very helpful structure, I admit, for struggling writers, one that they can discard when they start getting the hang of writing. After all, in the pool, it’s best to master floating before the freestyle and, with lined paper, conquering the LGSS is one more step to complete creative freedom.
So, I suggest changing the LGSS a little. Some of the steps could be more optional. The gist would be better as something more original than “for many reasons”. For example, “Harper Lee’s family life was, if anything, very difficult”, instead of “Harper Lee’s family life was difficult for several reasons”. The list, the bulk of the piece, could be equally functional as two very developed reasons instead of the usual three. But these are all “coulds” and “optionals.” The LGSS framework is quick and easy, and I don’t want to change that.
But, to come back to the rant, I have a freedom of speech, but no freedom after the speech. I know that once I decide to publish this complaint, adults will gasp and let their jaws drop to the floor. I know that no matter how much calamine lotion I coat over this complaint, the general idea will still sting those who value the LGSS. So, maybe I should have published this piece like -anonymously.

Note from Teacher: L L‘s extremely well-written personal opinion column or editorial effectively details her thoughts about the cons and pros of LGSS. She has articulated concerns that are shared by many of her teachers. The beauty of a framework is ease and familiarity. The failing of a framework is, too often, conformity that leads to the stifling of creativity. So LL, you make several excellent points and have given your teachers points to ponder. Now let me get to the task of lifting my jaw off the floor. (Only kidding.)





煮酒正熟 发表于 2011-8-21 08:35:46

回复 青方 的帖子

这样的诗文,即使在成年人里也是高手
后面这篇文字,我觉得很难得的是,这孩子有颗平常心,不偏颇不走极端。她敏锐地看到问题,勇敢地提出问题,但没有打倒推翻,而是提出建设性修改意见,最后还不忘小幽一默(匿名发表)。
老师也是妙人,称许一番之后也没忘记还之一默(捡下巴),充满善意地小小回击了一把 :-)
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